How did we come to this?

As a Christian woman, I have Christian friends, obviously, but not all Christians see or deal with issues the same way.

In light of New York legalising 40 week abortions I have seen most Christian women react by saying this is the work of the devil and the moral fabric of society is being ripped apart.

Imagine you’re that woman. Imagine you have gotten to a place where giving birth to a dead baby is your only and best option. At 40 weeks, that’s what that abortion is. There’s A LOT of restrictions on the 40 week abortions. They’re mostly reserved for late diagnosis of health risks to the mother or the baby or birth defects, which unfortunately can include Down Syndrome.

I am anti abortion but when friends have confided in me they have had one I don’t get up and walk out on them. I take them to dinner, I ask them how they feel, I ask them if there is anything I can do for them. I love them, because that’s what Jesus did for the adulteress woman (John 7), and the lady with oil (Luke 7), and the woman with the issue of blood (Luke 8). And just like I believe Jesus is God coming and taking a walk in our shoes, I try to walk in theirs and try to imagine how I could get to a place where I think abortion is my best option.

When I do this, I come up with this list of things I am more ‘anti’ than abortion.

  • Sex Ed that only says, save it for marriage instead of going through the female reproductive cycle and the stages of foetal development.
  • Men refusing to wear condoms because it doesn’t feel as good.
  • Church communities that are so ‘religious’ they would make a young woman feel ashamed to bring a baby into the world unmarried.
  • The break down of families so women don’t feel supported.
  • High rents.
  • Unaffordable education.
  • Not enough education on diet during pregnancy to minimise the amount of birth defects.
  • The fact that Down Syndrome is still seen as a birth defect.
  • Misdiagnosis of birth defects.
  • The lack of mental health professionals to help these women feel they can deal with any difficult situation.
  • Rape and violence against women.
Photo by Nathan Anderson on Unsplash

The outrage over the penalties for killing an eagle egg versus the lack of consequences for abortion I’ve seen posted many times. I know that God gave us ‘dominion over the animals’ in Genesis and scientifically speaking we do have bigger brains than they do so maybe we are more important. But the population of eagles, particularly in North America has only just left endangered, thanks to the government putting a stop to the use of DDT insecticide in agriculture which thinned the egg shells and meant many generations of eagles were never born. Having dominion doesn’t mean exercising your authority over another being. It means loving and caring for it. We’ve already killed 1000’s of eagles as well as making 1000’s of women feel like they are evil because they felt abortion was they’re only option.

If we truly believe that life begins at conception, let’s remember that it continues all the way to death, and into eternity. Let’s love and support those of us in our lives. Let’s let them know they are supported no matter how the choices they make affect their lives and ours. Let us let them know we have their backs and then maybe, instead of feeling alone and with only one, life-altering choice, they will rise up with wings as eagles and raise an incredible next generation.

This is quite a controversial subject. If you agree with me let me know. If you disagree with me, let me know.

I’m also doing some research on viewpoint of sex, dating and relationships in the church. I’d love for you to be part of that dialogue. There’s an anonymous survey at the link below to share your thoughts.

Be blessed xR

Welcome to the Journey


It’s been two hours since my husband text me to tell me he was going out because he was too sad to talk. It’s been four hours since we were supposed to go grocery shopping. Six hours since he expressed his opinion which triggered my insecurities and set me off talking as loud as my Australian voice will allow me; attracting the attention of all the quiet British people on the road we were walking.

woman in blue dress lying down on the street
Photo by Ronaldo Oliveira on

Marriage is tough. I don’t even know what the outcome of this will be. That’s why I want this to be the home post on this blog. It’s not about having the answers. It’s about voicing the problems and the more they’re spoken about, the less of a problem they are.

This blog will be about feminism, single life, dating, sex – before and after marriage, marriage itself, LGBT, probably music, as I am a bit of a music lover, and all from a Christian viewpoint.

cute friendship fun girl
Photo by Bahaa A. Shawqi on

The Bible says that nothing can separate us from the love of God. Growing up in Pentecostal church there are all sorts of ‘guilts’ we put on ourselves. Does God love me less if I stand up to a man? If I masturbate? If I date a non-christian? If no Christian men ask me out? If the only ‘wet-dreams’ I have are about women but I identify as straight? If I have sex before marriage? If it takes months before I have sex with my husband? If I never have sex with my husband? If my husband would rather walk out of the house than talk to me about how I made him sad?

bench nature love people
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So if you’re looking for absolute answers, I’m sorry but this isn’t the place for you. But if you’d like to read the misadventures of a Christian woman trying to navigate life and love and accepting her failings and working through them and hopefully have moments of, I’m not the only one, then welcome to the ride.

If you’d like to contribute to the conversation, we’re doing some research into sexual outlook from christian women all over the world and we’d love you to fill in our survey. Head here

For now though, I’m going to pray my husband comes home and we work through this together.

adult blur business city
Photo by Ana Paula Lima on